Did I mention I was scared?
I probably haven't yet because I have been too busy day-dreaming and planning my trip of a lifetime! (Click here -- Lost & Found: The necklace with a dream)
Well, I am totally scared.
What if I don't find whatever it is I'm looking for? What if I get lost? What if I don't make it in time? What if I really do get lonely?... All legitimate questions, right?
I called my little sister tonight to chit-chat through some of my anxiety. Julia is my exact-opposite little sister that analyzes anything she can get her hands on and would probably find no fun in traveling to California and back alone (which is totally okay, because this trip is not for everyone!).
I was pacing through the grocery store when I asked Julia, "can you believe I'm leaving?"
She paused to take in my question, "I mean... yeah. I totally can believe you're leaving and doing this, Eri."
I was surprised at her most calm tone. Julia usually has a lot to say about very little and this trip is NOT something very little. "So that's it?" I asked.
"Yeah!" she responded. "I mean... I know you're smart and you've just got to be aware and whatever happens..." she had the tone that hinted (if you get abducted or lost) "... then it was just meant to be!" She giggled.
It was then, standing in front of the collection of fresh tarts at the grocery store, that I realized that my little sister was completely right.
I had already made the decision to take this trip. I could "be careful" as much as I tried, but whatever is meant to happen will happen on this adventure... whether that's a flat tire, having the greatest spiritual journey of my life, and everything in between!
She ended the conversation reassuring me, "you're going to be okay, Eri. If anyone can do this, it's you!"
Jules hurried off the phone soon after. She had a study group to attend (I repeat, my exact opposite).
I told her goodbye with the warmest smile on my face. The lady behind the tart counter probably thought I was in love with her dessert display.
So as a tax for standing there far too long talking to my sister, I purchased one of those tarts, brought it home and finished up my packing.
In my belongings, I added one extra piece of jewelry. The necklace holding the two charms I purchased as motivation to get to California, three years ago.
The 'necklace with a dream' becomes the 'necklace with a plan'. Today, these two charms go back around my neck.
Tomorrow, we wander.